“My husband’s idea of getting the Christmas spirit is to become Scrooge.”
“A lovely thing about Christmas is that it’s compulsory, like a thunderstorm, and we all go through it together.”
“Christmas, here again. Let us raise a loving cup; Peace on earth, goodwill to men, and make them do the washing up.”
“Next to a circus there ain’t nothing that packs up and tears out faster than the Christmas spirit.”
“Christmas is a baby shower that went totally overboard.”
“Adults can take a simple holiday for children and screw it up. What began as a presentation of simple gifts to delight and surprise children around the Christmas tree has culminated in a woman unwrapping six shrimp forks from her dog, who drew her name.”
“Nothing’s as mean as giving a little child something useful for Christmas.”
“I stopped believing in Santa Claus when I was six. Mother took me to see him in a department store and he asked for my autograph.”