Police Officer watching Speeding Cars

confused “the sign back there says 10.”
“You’re mistaken ma’am, that sign was to tell you that this is route 10, the limit here 60.”
“Oh, my” says the woman very embarrassed, “I am so sorry, I will pay closer attention to the signs.”

At this point the police officer notices the other passengers in the car: three more elderly women,
all very pale and wide-eyed, clutching the armrests with white-knucked hands.

“Ma’am” he asks “are your passengers alright? They look quite shaken.”
“Oh, they’ll be fine, dear” says the elderly woman “we just turned off of route 250.”

When Little Johnny Talk Like An Adult

but let’s talk like an adult,
remember? “My family enjoyed a
fine bowl of macaroni and cheese” –.
do you see? OK, Becky, you try: What pets do you have?

Becky: My mommy has a kitty and my daddy has a bunny.
Mrs. Smith: That’s great, but as an adult, remember?

“My mother has a cat and my father has a rabbit.”
Little Johnny, you try: What did you do for fun last night?

Little Johnny thinks hard and replies
Well, my mommy and my daddy and me all watched Winnie the Shit

When He shows Up His A New Bike

girl on her bike came up to me
started taking off her clothes

and said ‘its all yours’ so I
just took the bike” he said.

His friend replied “Good choice
bro the clothes probably didn’t even fit you”

When Einstein Became Driver

while the real Einstein, dressed as the car driver, attends it.
But in the crowd, there is one scientist who wants to impress everyone and thinks of a very difficult question to ask Einstein, hoping he won’t be able to respond. So this guy stands up and interrupts the conference by posing his very difficult question. The whole room goes silent, holding their breath, waiting for the response.
The driver looks at him, dead in the eye, and says :
“Sir, your question is so easy to answer that I’m going to let my driver reply to it for me.”