dies, plant a new one in my memory. Tell your descendants to
do the same. It shall be our family’s duty to keep this forest strong.”
And so they did.
Each time the forest lost a tree, the children replanted one, and
so did their children, and their children after them.
And for centuries, the forest remained as lush and pretty as it once was,
all because of one man and his re-seeding hairline.
a talking tree, but you will dialogue.”
with this man. The manager, hearing the story, goes back to the man to see what the problem is.
After asking the man, he responds with ” There is no fucking problem. All I wanna do is cash my
10 million dollar check from winning the lottery and then put it in this goddamn bank!”
The manager responds with “Oh, and is this bitch over here giving you any problems, sir?”
says, “I don’t know if it’s
in yet.” The man replies,
“Yeah, that’s the one!”
“You’re on the other
side!”
man responds, “You may be a
talking tree, but you will dialogue.”
if your heart is soft as
your breast, I know you’ll
forgive me.” She replies,
“If your penis is as hard
as your elbow, I’m in room 436.”
says, “I don’t know if it’s
in yet.” The man replies,
“Yeah, that’s the one!”
replies the man. “Just
pray for stiffness,”
says the wife, “and
I’ll guide the fucker.”
detached from the body. With no time to put it back, the man ran as fast as he could in the opposite direction of the cops. He was nearly out of the graveyard when he was caught. There had apparently been cops waiting to surround him. Defeated, the man let the cops cuff him. They didn’t leave the graveyard immediately. The cops asked him questions for what seemed like hours. Finally one cop stopped him mid sentence. “Look pal. I don’t know why you feel like you have to lie about this entire thing.” Confused, the man fell silent. He’d been truthful the entire time. This cop was crazy! “Tell me,” the cop said in response to the man’s silence, “Whose leg do you think you’re pulling?”
responds, “Well, it all
started with a little lump
on my butt.”
Dearest Darling, This is a…
little gift to show my affection for you on our Anniversary. I chose these because I noticed that you are not in the habit of wearing any when you go out in the evenings. If it had not been for your younger sister, I would have chosen the long ones with buttons, but she wears the short ones that are easy to remove.
These are a delicate shade, but the lady I bought them from showed me a pair that she had been wearing for three weeks and they were hardly soiled. I had the sales girl try them on and she really looked great. I wish I could put them on you for the first time. No doubt other men’s hands will come in contact with them before I have a chance to see you again.
When you take them off, blow in them before putting them away as they will naturally be a little damp from wearing. Be sure to keep them on when you clean them or they might shrink. I hope you will like them and wear them for me on Friday night. All my love,
P.S. Just think of how many times I will kiss them during the coming year. Also, the latest style is to wear them folded down with the fur showing
disgusted tone “No” So the
man says “ok let’s go camping”
dogs could talk.”
The horse says, “Me neither!”
know dogs could talk.”
The horse says, “Me neither!”