Category: Funny Jokes Hilarious Adult Humor

What’s better than a hilarious joke? A hilarious joke that’s filled with smut and innuendo, of course. And have we got some great dirty jokes for you.

From naughty gags to close-to-the-knuckle toilet humor, look no further. Short rude jokes, jokes, chat-up lines, Rude knock-knock jokes.

Two Clever Nuns

SL: It’s logical. He wants to violate us.SM: Oh, no! At this rate he will reach us in 15 minutes at the most! What can we do?SL: The only logical thing to do of course is to walk faster.A little while later…SM: It’s not working.SL: Of course it’s not working. The man did the only…

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Jurors Call Defense Attorney’ Bluff

The jurors, stunned,all looked eagerly. A minute passed. Nothing happened. Finallythe lawyer said, “Actually, I made up the business about the deadman walking in. But you all looked at the door with anticipation. Itherefore put it to you that there is reasonable doubt in this caseas to whether anyone was killed, and I must insist…

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When Alterations go Horribly Wrong

The man says, “Well, okay, but now look at the collar! When I bend my elbow, the collar goes halfway up the back of my head.”The tailor says, “So? Raise your head up and back. Perfect.”The man says, “But now the left shoulder is three inches lower than the right one!”The tailor says, “No problem.…

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The Cutting Edge of Romance

he charges within and demands of the girl at the counter that she sells him flowers.‘I’m sorry, sir’ she explains. ‘We’re not a florist. We’re a vasectomy clinic’‘But..’ he objects, feeling cheated ‘you have a bouquet of flowers in your front window!’‘What would sir suggest we put in the window?’ She asks.

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A powerful Emperor advertised for a new Chief Samurai.

A powerful Emperor advertised for a new Chief Samurai. Only three applied for the job: a Japanese, a Chinese and a Jewish Samurai. LNumber One Samurai, “Demonstrate your skills!” commanded the Emperor. The Japanese samurai stepped forward, opened a tiny box, and released a fly. He drew his samurai sword and “swish”; the fly fell…

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man overseas fighting a war

He went around to his buddies and collected all the unwanted photos of women he could find. In all, he got more than 25 pictures of various women (some with clothes and some without). He then mailed them to his now-former girlfriend with the following note: “I don’t remember which one you are. Please remove…

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Weekend end Planes

Next up is Rose “I rode the choo choo with my family” “Sounds fun!” The teacher replies “but again, we use big kid words. You rode the train with your family” Then it’s Johnny’s turn to talk about his weekend, he thinks for a second, then says “this weekend I watched Winnie the Shit with…

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The young Rabbi was and Avid Golfer

An angel who witnessed this miracle complained to God, “This guy is playing golf on Yom Kippur, and you cause him to get a hole in one? This is a punishment?” “Of course it is,” said the Lord, smiling. “Who can he tell?”

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Customer in Italian Restaurant

“Your pizza is superb,” the customer tells the chef. “I just spent a month in Italy, and yours is better than any I ever had over there.” “Naturally,” the chef says. “Over there, they use domestic cheese. Ours is imported!”

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7 Year old and a 4 Year old

“I’ll have frosties, bitch”WHACK, he flew out of his chair crying his eyes out. Mum looks at the 4 year old and says sternly “And what do you want?”“I don’t know, but it won’t be fucking frosties”

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In a Local Bar

(weightlifters, longshoremen, etc.) but nobody could do it.One day a scrawny little man came in, wearing thick glasses and a cheap suit, and said in a tiny, squeaky voice, “I’d like to try the bet.”After the laughter had died down, the bartender said okay, grabbed a lemon, and squeezed away. Then he handed the wrinkled…

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What do You Want to Be When You Grow Up ?

an apartment in Copacabana,a mansion in Paris, a jet to travel throughout Europe, an Infinite Visa Card, and all the while banging her like a loose screen door ina hurricane.”The teacher, shocked and not knowing what to do with this horrible response from little Johnny, decides not to acknowledge what he said and simply tries…

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Blonde In Store

Finally the blonde got fed up and said, “That’s it! How’d you know I was a blonde?!” she asked.The salesman answered: “Cause that’s a microwave.”

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Putin Was Being Held Hostage by a Terrorist

him on fire. So we’re asking drivers for donations.”The driver said, “Oh, ok. How much do people donate on average?”“About a gallon.”

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English, Scots Irish Mans

the judge said “I love Ireland, it has given us the greatest music, poets, writers and art – because of this you get 2 requests” The Irishman thought and said “firstly I’d like 200 lashes, and second of all strap the Englishman to my back”

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