Story Teller 
then asks the guy, “do you work around dyes or paints or anything like that?”
Guy says, “no.”
Doc asks, “Any chemicals or solvents?”
Guy says, “no doc, I don’t even have a job, all I ever do is sit around watching
pornos and eating Cheetos.”
favorite favorite kind of beer?”
The chicken says “Bock, bock, bock.”
The bartender says “Ha, ha, very funny, pal!”
The guy says “No, really! He can talk! Freddie, what’s a male deer called?”
The chicken says “Buck, buck, buck.”
The bartender says, “Okay, it was funny the first time, but now it’s kind of annoying!”
The guy says, “I swear! Give me one more chance! Freddie, who’s the best composer ever?”
The chicken says “Bach, Bach, Bach.”
The bartender says, “All right, that’s it! You’re outta here!” And the bartender throws him and the chicken out.
The guy says, “Freddie, you really disappointed me! How come you didn’t prove to the bartender that you can talk?”
The chicken says “what did you want me to say, Beethoven?“
Beside himself with shock and grief, he retreats down the steps, drops the box of chocolates and the flowers in defeat as his life flashes before his eyes.
His suicidal thoughts are interrupted by mattress testing getting louder.
He snaps, grabs a baseball bat and goes back into the bedroom.
There he goes to town on the love birds under the blankets, whacking until all movement stops.
A few minutes later, he is in his kitchen, contemplating ending himself, when his wife comes up from the basement.
“Hi baby,” she says. “I’m very happy to see you back early, but since you weren’t supposed to be here tonight and your parents showed up late, I hope you don’t mind I let them have our bedroom for the night. I’m pretty sure they’re still up, have you had a chance to say hello?”
When the lawyer arrived, the man asked his physician to stand on one side of the bed & the lawyer on the other. The man then laid back & closed his eyes. When asked what he had in mind, he replied:
“Jesus died with a thief on either side. I just thought I’d check out the same way.”
slipped out of his hand and he exclaimed “shit!”
It took 2 weeks to clean that whole place.
At the sound, her family rushed into
the room and saw this note on the screen:
Dearest Wife,
Just got checked in. Everything prepared
for your arrival tomorrow.
P.S. Sure is hot down here.
turn, saying “Third time’s a charm, right?” and BLAM!! She drops dead.
Danielle picks up the gun and looks at it. “Hey,” she asks Brooke,
“Isn’t this game played with a revolver?”
out ten minutes later and says,
“You know? Your wife is better.”
gets the best of her so she asks the bartender to have the frog go down on her.
She gets up on the bar in the appropriate position and the bartender puts the
frog there and tells it to do its thing. The frog just sits there.
The bartender moves the frog to the side and says, “I’m only going to show you one more time!”
Blonde says
OK when was I born?
Guy says: Yesterday.
“Is there anything specific you’re
looking for?” “Yes,” said the
customer.
his friend, “we try to talk to girls, get them interested in us.
He does none of that, he just sits there entire evening, licking his eyebrows.”
I love introducing students to science fiction. We really don’t use it enough in our English classes. In this story, two aliens discuss the bizarre new life form they’ve discovered and try to figure out how it thinks and lives. Your students will laugh out loud when they discover that the aliens are talking about humans and love figuring out the everyday activities and items the aliens just can’t seem to make sense of.
In class: This is perfect for introducing a new genre to students. After reading, ask students to craft their own science-fiction short story. As a class, brainstorm a list of activities of events that take place all the time that we think are totally normal. Then, ask students to write their version of an alien race trying to figure out a birthday party, after-school detention, or lunch in the school cafeteria.
Written by the same woman who wrote the eerie short story “The Lottery,” this story is guaranteed to make students of all ages chuckle. The tale of the worst kindergarten student ever, as told by a student in the same class to his mother at the end of every school day, your students will love hearing all about Charles’s antics. The twist at the end of the tale will make students gasp and giggle.
In class: Perfect for lessons on irony, your students can debate whether Jackson’s funny short story demonstrates verbal, situational, or dramatic irony. I’ve also used this story to show students how an author can utilize dialogue as a method for developing characterization.22Thank You, Ma’am by Langston Hughes
Like “Charles,” this is another classic, well-known story. An older woman takes a young man under her wing after he attempts to steal her purse. As they spend time together, she teaches him a valuable lesson about life. It’s perfect for upper-elementary and middle school students.
In class: This is one of those funny short stories that lends itself to lessons about dialogue, diction, theme, and characterization. It’s also a great text to use for practice discussions or Socratic seminars. Students could easily develop questions about the actions of the characters. They could consider how they would have responded in the same situation. And they could even reimagine the story as if it were written today.
2While many students will have read “The Gift of the Magi,” this short story by the same author is much less well known. Lord Oakhurst is dying, his wife is grieving (or is she?), and a doctor arrives to try to help. Your students will be shocked and amused by this quick read.
In class: Indirect characterization leaps to the foreground in this funny short story as students can debate whether Lord Oakhurst’s wife is truly as sad as she says she is throughout the story. The story also makes use of flashbacks, making it great for introducing or reviewing that concept.
Satire is a tough genre for so many students. The popular satirical online news magazine The Onion comes to the rescue here with a hysterical piece that, while not a short story exactly, certainly tells a tale students will guffaw over. In the article, students learn the plight of a young man who almost received severe consequences for driving while under the influence. Some satirical pieces are almost too serious for students to see as satire, but this one does a great job of taking a serious subject and turning it on its head to make a point.
In class: This piece is perfect for students who aren’t ready to grapple with some of the more complex satirical pieces they’re often given in school. If your group isn’t quite ready for Swift’s A Modest Proposal, this is a great place to start. As an introduction to satire, pairing this piece with actual news reports of cases where privileged young people have received shockingly light sentences for serious crimes will definitely keep your students engaged (and enraged?).
This short story caper takes on the classic detective trope and mocks it mercilessly. Over-the-top costumes, mistaken identities, and a ridiculous reveal make this a truly funny short story to share with your students.
In class: I wish I still taught the mystery unit I taught for many years so that I could add this funny short story to the mix. This is a perfect piece to introduce satire. It mocks many of the most common elements of typical detective stories in a truly hilarious fashion.
Given her popularity in current popular culture, Margaret Atwood is an author our students should know. This short story about a fairy-tale writer receiving some “constructive criticism” on how to make their story more inclusive is sure to inspire reactions among your middle or high schoolers.
In class: This is a great short story to use when teaching the importance of how dialogue can impact tone. Additionally, it would be a great piece to bring to any discussion of whether or not students should read “old” stories that have language or ideas that are considered problematic today.
